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Writer's pictureRon Hender

WTNE grabs final playoff spot

Congrats to Jordan Garcia for securing his first playoff appearance. The bad news, Jordan? You have to play your father-in-law, who has won 5 in a row.

Davante Adams (17) scored 33 points on Sunday to make both his quarterback Aaron Rodgers (8) and Rangers owner John Lambert extremely happy.


As it usually does, the final playoff spot came down to the final game of the season, and Jordan's WTNE stepped up to the challenge and advanced. Well, it helped that he was playing the 3-12 Packers. And that his competition for the final spot, the Tirades, were playing the Band Aids, the Shitty Teams Division leaders and the league's highest scoring team. But I digress. And whine a little.


The other big news in the final week came from the Rangers. John Lambert's team has surged to close out the regular season and, thanks to a rout over the Beaters last weekend and yet another Gerbils upset win, ended up tied with the Recliners atop the Silent Division standings at 11-4. More importantly, though, that gave John the top seed in the playoffs because his team outscored Chris Zimnoch's Recliners 1536-1374. In fact, three teams that DIDN'T make the playoffs outscored the Recliners: The Tirades (1448, finished 7-8), Beaters (1390, finished 6-9) and Gerbils (1389, finished 7-8). Who says life is fair?


So the Rangers take on WTNE and the Recliners face the Band Aids. Vern "Swami" Ahrendes will preview those matchups on Thursday. Today, we'll recap last weekend's thrilling regular-season finales.


RANGERS 142, BEATERS 64: John rolled into the No. 1 spot in the playoffs with some help from WR Davante Adams, who scored a season-high 33 points. Rangers QB Jalen Hurts added 28 and WR Mike Evans 27. John's third WR, Nico Collins, "only" scored 13. For Matt "I won't win three in a row" Pringle, Amon-Ra St. Brown had 24 and QB Kyler Murray had 10 but were the only guys in double-figures. On the Bench: WRs Brian Thomas Jr. (22) and Ladd McConkey (11) and K Will Reichard (15) all did score in double-figures for the Beaters, but who cares. No one on the Rangers bench would have helped (and three guys had donuts).


BAND AIDS 129, TIRADES 100: QB Josh Allen tried to lift the Tirades to victory in this one, outscoring his Band Aids counterpart, Lamar Jackson, 40-36. But he got very little help from his teammates. Bob, on the other hand, got a big game from RB James Conner (25) and 19 more from former Tirades WR Terry "I only score for Bob" McLaurin to finish at 10-5 and with the highest scoring team (1555 points) in the JSFL for 2024. Band Aids K Chase McLaughlin and RB Josh Jacobs both added 18. For the loser Tirades, RB Aaron Jones had 16 and WR Jerry Jeudy had 10 in his first start of the season for the Tirades, and as luck would have it, he replaced A.J. Brown in the lineup, and Brown scored 17 on the bench. Also On the Bench: Bob could have improved slightly with Jared Goff (+4) in at QB and with Jonnu Smith (+8) at TE.


GERBILS 108, RECLINERS 102: Chuck Nelson's team scored its second upset win in three weeks (they beat the Tirades 112-106 in Week 13) and in the process kept Chris from winning the Silent Division title outright -- he also lost the No. 1 seed, and has to play the Band Aids as a result. Ouch! Chuck's RB trio of Jamyr Gibbs (23), Chase Brown (22) and Bucky Irving (11) led the way. He also got 11 from QB Sam Darnold and WR Drake Evans, and WR Tee Higgins added 14. The Recliners had seven of the nine starters score in double figures, but only the Texans defense (15) scored more than 13. On the Bench: While Chris could have possibly won this had he started DeVonta Smith (+7) at WR over Courtland Sutton (who's been hot), Chuck could have countered with QB Pat Mahomes (+5), the Rams defense (+7) and K Blake Grupe (+4).


WTNE 103, PACKERS 60: QB Jayden Daniels (22) led the way for Jordan, who got 16 from RB Saquon Barkley and 12 each from his other two RBs, Rachaad White and Alvin Kamara. WRs Xavier Worthy (13) and Puka Nacua (10) also scored in double figures. The Chiefs defense had 21 for the Pack. On the Bench: Nothing to see here. Move along.


INVAIDERS 97, WHO DEY 86: Vern cost himself a draft position with this win, with a loss he would have finished behind the Beaters through the points tiebreaker. His Cowboys led the way, as WR Ceedee Lamb had a team-high 17, K Brandon Aubrey had 16, the defense scored 15 and RB Rico Dowdle had 14. Flex James Cook led Who Dey with 24. On the Bench: Nothing to see here. We're done.

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